Fantasy–Reality Congruence
The degree to which a person’s fantasies align with what they actually want (and is ethical) to do in real life.
What This Really Means
Low congruence is normal: many fantasies are symbolic, taboo, or narrative-driven without being desired in practice.
High congrruence can support exploration when consent, safety, and boundaries are clear.
Reports should avoid shame and clearly separate arousal (fantasy) from intention (practice).
Examples
Enjoying a fantasy theme but not wanting to enact it
Wanting to try a mild version of a fantasy with clear limits
Keeping certain fantasies private and imagination-only.
Common Misunderstandings
Tap each myth to reveal the reality
Fantasy–Reality Congruence points to the degree to which a person’s fantasies align with what they actually want (and is ethical) to do in real life, so congruence must be high to be healthy is a misunderstanding.
Fantasy–Reality Congruence isn’t an all-the-time rule, and it can change with context and timing.
Consent matters more than any goal or label, and Fantasy–Reality Congruence is secondary to that.
Fantasy–Reality Congruence does not mean you’re lying, and it refers to the degree to which a person’s fantasies align with what they actually want (and is ethical) to do in real life.
Tags
Inside LoveIQ
We identify patterns related to Fantasy–Reality Congruence by analyzing responses in our assessment modules, helping you understand your unique relationship dynamics.
Sample visualization of a gap metric.
“You don't need to label yourself. These terms help describe patterns — not define you.”
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